changes come, turn my world around

Life is about to change for me...again.
After much thought, advice from wise people, and prayer, we decided that I needed to quit my job before the end of the year. I think I mentioned a couple of posts ago that our medical insurance is going to drop my coverage if I'm not in school fulltime by January. I've known this was coming for my whole life, but I never thought I'd be in this position when it came. I always thought that by the time I was 21 I'd already be in school fulltime and it wouldn't be an issue. But the reality is that it's a big issue and getting dropped from health insurance right now is not cool, so I will be registering for school in a few weeks and starting right after Christmas. My parents and I decided that it would be best for me not to continue managing my store while I'm jumping back into school. It was a hard decision to make since, by the time I quit, I will have only been at my store for a year. Thankfully, I have a very understanding boss who, at least in front of me, took the news well. It will be hard to leave the place that I helped bring up from the ground but I'm grateful that they gave me the opportunity to do it.

As far as school goes, I still have no idea what I'll be doing. In this whole 2 years of pondering and self-reflection and researching, I haven't become passionate or even extremely interested in one area of study. If you remember, before I got sick, I was going the Nursing School route, so when I started thinking about school again, I thought I'd just get back into nursing and pick up where I left off. It seems that it's not that easy though. At the rate I'd be going when I start, I think I'd have one or two more semesters of class work before it would be time to start clinicals and real nursing training, but with my condition, no nursing school or hospital would let me do that. I'd have to be close to completely healed and definitely off of most of my drugs before they'd let me train in a hospital.
With that in mind, I started researching and thinking about other majors I could switch to. Nothing came up. There's really nothing else that interests me at this point. Not that there won't be something once I'm in school again, but for now, I have no ideas. So my dilemma is this: Do I waste money paying for classes that I really don't want to take or that won't get me anywhere just to satisfy Tricare and to keep the mandated fulltime status? Or do I go with the nursing track again, praying that I'll get better sometime between now and the actual nurse training and praying that these next two semesters aren't a total waste? Who knows...

Thanks to all who were praying for the most recent round of tests and MRIs. Everything went well except for the MRI, which the tech said was terrible because of my braces. This was a critical MRI and was supposed to show us in detail what kind of damage has occurred and how to possibly fix it. The tech who was doing it said that his guess was that they'd have to redo it after my braces are off. :( No fun. I have an appointment on Thursday with a new doctor that I haven't seen before and he's supposed to be the leading lower-brain specialist in the Air Force. We're praying that appointment goes well and that we'll have lots of new information (and that he'll be able to read the MRI anyway).
The subject of brain surgery seems to be surfacing in conversations more frequently and I've been talking with more people about the possibility. I'm not quite as opposed to it as I had been, but I told my sisters that the only way I'd do it is if they all agree to shave their heads with me. I already have my friend Emily on board, the older sisters are pondering the idea, but Beth and Shelley are definitely opposed. Just think of the priceless pictures we would have if they would all go bald with me... :)

Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as he has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while he dwelt below.