psych-o

Excepts from the Fake Psychology Papers:

This is me with Claire, the sweet fluffy dog who inspired Shelley's paper...My name is Claire, although most people call me Clairebear. I don't
mind, because they say it
because they love me. I am a registered therapist. I have brown eyes
and white, curly hair. Everyone
says I am very soft—whether in texture or spirit, I am not sure.
Almost everyone likes me. I can't say the
same for almost everyone. I enjoy being held by my mother, food
(biscuits in particular), Sue, and the
vibrations in the floor when my mother plays piano. I will try to let
loose what I feel in this paper.
I don't know how I got everyone to like me so much, I consider myself
fairly normal, plus, I
sometimes have very mean thoughts about certain people, or just people
in general. It was probably my
mother's doing, she tends to talk me up as much as possible around
people. But I love her more than
anything in the world. I hate when she leaves me all alone every day.
But then I am so happy when she
comes home in the evening. I know she loves me just as much as I love her.
My mother is a music teacher. Why, she is quite the best musician I
know of, but then, I don't
get out much. I love to look up at her while she plays the piano. I
never could play more than one key at
a time, not having any proper digits. Still, I love to hear her play.
Sometimes she'll let me sit on top of
the piano while she plays.
Probably the most tragic aspect of my life is the fact that I am
colorblind. People think it doesn't
bother me, but it truly does. But what I lack in eyesight, I make up
for with my keen sense of smell. It has
served me well in protecting my house, as does my acute hearing. I
have been able to guard my family
from strangers my whole life (and when I say "strangers," I mean everyone).
I think I might have a disorder of some sort: I love to lick things.
Anything, really, people, shoes,
furniture, anything I can get my tongue on. I can't help it. There are
just so many things to taste! I also
have severe allergies which keep me in the house primarily.
As I mentioned, I work with therapy patients. I like them because I
know they can't hurt me. But
when I go, my mother usually makes me wear one of my ridiculous
sweaters. I only really like to wear
clothes in the wintertime.
Since I'm home most of the time, I don't get a lot of physical
activity, so I pant a lot. My tongue
hangs out in a very unattractive way, but no one seems to care.
I love to sleep, preferably in the window, where I can watch the
door. Sleeping makes me happy.
Sometimes I dream that I can walk with my back straight up. When I
walk, I'm very close to the ground,
which makes my neck hurt because I have to look up all of the time.
My favorite movie is Balto. I watch it every day. Balto is so dreamy!
My favorite scene is when
Balto shows Jenna the replica of the Northern Lights. That movie has
always inspired me—I always
wanted to be a hero, like Balto.
I love when my brother and sister are home. They always bring me
treats. They are just as gifted
as Mother is. They are my best friends, except for Sue. Sue lives in
the kitchen, and I only see him when I
walk by the oven. Sue is very awkward, he won't talk until I start
talking, then there's an uncomfortable
silence, but he's still my best friend. I love how I can look at Sue
and his face conveys everything I am
feeling at that moment. His behaviors perfectly mimic mine, like we
are long lost twins. He's the only
one who understands me.
So this is my life. I have many feelings, and have tried to convey as
many of them as I could in
this paper. My name is Claire, and I am a dog.




Caleb's "Rose the Mermaid" paper to come!